Recently read this great article on brides and their tantrums. Find it here. Learned a new expression. The CTFD Method of coping with weddings. It stands for Calm the Fuck Down. And the writer gave a bunch of examples that so hit the spot that I laughed out loud.
Writing about weddings and wedding venues now as I am doing for a work project I’ve come across a bunch of hilarious stuff. And the one thought that crosses my mind is that they should have used the CTFD Method.
In particular the one amusing bit that comes up quite regularly is about wedding gifts. And the expectations around those. Although I must admit when I got married too many years ago to remember entirely we also had a few words to say about the three toasters we got. Never mind the cheap cake fork set and as for the oven gloves with strawberries on them. Yip, I remember those. They lasted for ever.
And that was the particularly funny part of the article. The bit where you can’t forget what so-and-so gave you for your wedding. And you remember it until your dying days. Carrying a grudge for years over something totally insignificant. At least I can’t remember who gave us the strawberry gloves. So I can’t carry the grudge anymore. (:
In particular brides tend to be the most vicious when supposedly rich people neglect to hand over some gorgeously expensive gift that they have always wanted. And as for those brides who themselves gave their friend/acquaintance a gift from a store in expensive Fifth Avenue and doesn’t get an equally expensive gift in return, she is an enemy for life.
Apparently it gets weirder than this. Men get away with it. They don’t bring wedding gifts? No problem. Poor dear probably didn’t know what to get. But the women? No such luck. They should have known better. Taken out a second mortgage on the house to buy a glorious gift. That’s what they should have done.
Regrettably the entire wedding industry is geared towards making a wedding the me-focused, exhibitionistic, overspent event where supposed traditions dictate how the bride and her party should behave and how guests should toe the line. Including expensive gifts.
What it should be is a celebration of an event where you as bride should be thankful that people actually arrive traveling from afar and where what you offer is a gift not based on any gratuitous reciprocal expectations! So apply the CTFD Method whenever you overreach yourself….